:: reader k ::

Monday, October 31, 2005

mr noboru watanabe

rain.

today I saw
mr noboru watanabe
in function.

finally.

another entity.

somehow,
a smile on my face.
followed by a quiet laugh.

reader k | 10/31/2005 09:10:00 AM | 0 comments

heading for no where

i fear
this is deteriorating
this is disappearing

i felt
the stretch
the suspension
the effort

i don't know
where it is going.

you will say
i think too much
again.

you didn't know.
i fear
as much.

i want it to go somewhere.
not hanging.

but,
where?

reader k | 10/31/2005 12:46:00 AM | 0 comments

Friday, October 28, 2005

you

yesterday
i bought you
an ice-cream.
you ate it
in the rain.

how seriously idiotic.

and that is you.

reader k | 10/28/2005 10:17:00 PM | 3 comments

Wednesday, October 26, 2005

chloe

this is for the girl who says hi to my shoes.

dried petals.
it need not be so.
your freshness is within,
always,
never-ending.

your spirit springs
into every soul you know.
your laughter echos
everytime we parted.

those frowns appear
when seriousness kicks in,
worries unnecessary.
just hope the hugs help
ease them away,
iron out the frowns.

don't shed the tear
that is not meant to be.
never will need to be.

adore you,
you being you.

reader k | 10/26/2005 01:28:00 AM | 0 comments

Tuesday, October 25, 2005

not the end yet

my mind shut down after the 21st.
cough cough cough cough followed.
then i awoke
to find
work
more.

i drifted away with my 23s
now i'm back.
i have to start the new year here.
now.
this day.

let's get through halloween first,
shall we?

next year will be scary for me.
scare scare scare
scare
scare
i am but so small
just.

----------------------------------------------------
to do:
teen companion 2006 (i want to do it!!)
testimonial (i have to do it and i want to do it!!!)
IT portfolio proposal (i also want to do it!!)
SJAB TIC training (erm...)
SJAB budget plan (have to do it)
SJAB 12 mths plan (have to do it)
SS for O levels Art Exam (I'm paid to do it)
2006 Syllabus for sec 1, 3 and 4 art (must do it!!)
shopping (SURE!!)
coffee (definitely!!!)
sleep (lacking)

reader k | 10/25/2005 10:42:00 PM | 4 comments

Sunday, October 23, 2005

an end to a new beginning

for the last time:
(but missing my favourite Ikhwan-khwan)

my sweet 9/23
suet.naz.kangaroo.amirah.fizah.rathiya.tingting.sotapia.clair

my sweet 9/23
layee.lala.GC.gnoelnik.ben-greenday.qixian.ikhwan-khwan.desmeow.hazmi

my sweet 5/23
raihan.kangkang.mr teu.weisong.bob

an impromtu - can't resist.

and there left the 3 of us.
we were your mrs m, ms ng and mdm reh
now we are your karen, clarisse and rehana

we say hello
and we were only strangers.

you are my supernova
and we're not giving up on you.

now we are friends,
we have to say goodbye.

or not.

may the superpower of Pikachu be with you!

reader k | 10/23/2005 02:37:00 PM | 2 comments

enter[neoteric]

pop by NIE after 3rd movement opening.
B's BA grad show
- enter[neoteric]

mixture of incidents . thoughts . people . feelings
saw serene, swee eem and likeng
- hugs!

saw hasan
- new hair-do, fly curls fly

saw juneo
- still drink till his face turns red

saw paul
- still proper

saw john matthews
- we stood to look at jupiter while he told me the statistics of the star.
it was the brightest that night.

saw DaWu
- ever so-inspiring!

saw jane & daughter
- looking better than great!

B's work "My name is Gua" on Plato's Cave

Cecelia's performance of "Where is the Dustbin"

and i forgot the rest.

food is always the greatest piece of work.
BBQ prawns, fish, corns, otahs and satays - LIVE
my bad cough forbids me to enjoy to the fullest.

3 gate-crashed kids.
i fed them with the glamourous food
and chased them away.

sat and chat till everything was cleared up,
till the gallery door was shut.
W and S came in time to see the closing.

A.K.B.G - W is late.

-----------------------------------------------------

side note:
spoke to JM and DaWu.
MA in education for Sec Sch
MA in Fine Arts
all very tempting.
JM asked if i'm interested to give a talk.
very tempting.

i want to go back to school.

reader k | 10/23/2005 01:51:00 PM | 1 comments

Saturday, October 22, 2005

move on with heads high up!!!

23 not gone,
just moving on.
so happy for them.

they took everything with them
- the mirrors, the "exit" signage, anything they can rip off.

i am left with the door.
and lots of good memories.

we grow,
from here.

good day.
good night.
never goodbye.

here's the link to the pics
after the graduation ceremony 21 0ct 2005

and here's the link to the pics that we all laughed our heads off
the sec 5s when they were still young and innocent with bad haircuts - hahaha

reader k | 10/22/2005 02:49:00 PM | 0 comments

what does it take?

some of the committee members
at the night of setting up the exhibition

looking at the completion of the setting up,
we forgot
our tiredness,
our frustrations,
our lack of sleep,
weight-loss for some of us,
other works piling up,
our whines,
our falling sick.

simply enjoying the satisfaction
we have crafted.

i thank this team
for helping me to grow creatively.

i thank the supportive friends
who give me the pat on the back
and the impromtu coffee sessions to release my stress.

without all these care and concerns,
not able.

reader k | 10/22/2005 01:38:00 AM | 0 comments

Thursday, October 20, 2005

we don't have another year

never have i made you cry.
i
the door-slammer
the sweets provider
the handphones keeper
the entry-proofs keeper
the nagger
the scolder
the money lender
the letter writer
the art teacher (for some)
the cme teacher
the form teacher
the mother (for some)
the driver (for some)
the attendance-taker
the MCs collector
the reminder

have done almost all i could and would,
but had never make you cry.

3 minutes of speech
to sum up all i want to say to you?
far too short.
but we don't have another year,
do we?

reader k | 10/20/2005 12:01:00 AM | 4 comments

Tuesday, October 18, 2005

sick + work = sickwork

sick.
wanted to see them
but didn't make it.
that's my "argh!"
for today.

work always find
a way to me,
sick or not sick
at home or in school.
the evil phone,
i'm so reachable.

reader k | 10/18/2005 09:22:00 PM | 0 comments

Monday, October 17, 2005

seriously, forget-me-not

checklist for exhibition:
1) poster - done and printed
2) coasters - done and printed
3) invites - done and sent
4) 6-sided (1.2 x 2.4) m panels which i have no idea what content to place in - still doing
5) artist statement labels - NOT started

*note, if i were to do all these for freelance
it's at least a 1k job.
but now, zero cent.

checklist for admin:
1) lower-sec art marks - almost all in
2) upper-sec marks - all in
3) comments of 600 characters per student - all in
4) result slips - printed and signed
5) O levels art courseworks -FINALLY IN!!!
6) testimonials - have not started

checklist for miscellaneous:
1) SJAB open house banner - still doing
2) Photos to be printed for open house - Saved but not printed
3) Graduation Ceremony Banner - done and sent for print
4) 23 letters for 5B - no time to write : (
5) Teen Comapanion 2006 Design - not started yet

*banner and TC design, at least a 600 dope job.

and this is so not-me today.
1.
dropped off a kid outside school coming back from exam center.
10 mins later, while having lunch with 2 other kids,
i asked where W was.
i forgot.

2.
YC passed me a calculator,
to pass to SN.
Chloe and Kat came sat and chat.
2 mins later, i saw the calculator in my hand,
i asked who is it for.
i forgot.

3.
i totally, totally forgot
i have to attend a meeting at 2.30pm.

i must remember myself tomorrow.
ask me who i am.

reader k | 10/17/2005 10:18:00 PM | 3 comments

Sunday, October 16, 2005

looking for jack

i lost my hair stylist.

argh!

where is he?

reader k | 10/16/2005 11:13:00 PM | 0 comments

ate

- timbre -
at the substation.

reader k | 10/16/2005 02:17:00 AM | 0 comments

lingnah's work

stepping into lingnah's work.

reader k | 10/16/2005 01:53:00 AM | 3 comments

tàpies in singapore

i saw tàpies in spain.
i see tàpies in singapore.

reader k | 10/16/2005 01:39:00 AM | 0 comments

Saturday, October 15, 2005

5 more days of 5B

leave a mark before you go.

suet . naz . kangaroo .
amirah . hafizah . rathiya .
ting the sunshine . sotapia .
clair the angel . lay ee .
lala . van . gnoelnik . ben-greenday .
qixian . ikhwan-my idol .
desmeow . hazmi-the-stand-up-guy .
raihan . kang kang the chicken .
captain teu . wei song . bob .

my next form class will have to fight hard
to get an important place in my heart.
23 of you, my darlings.

reader k | 10/15/2005 01:04:00 AM | 0 comments

J wrote a story about K

on 9th mar 2003, 1.03am
J wrote a story about K.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

k

1. playground love

‘The first person I’d discussed
About the best way to kill oneself
Is the person I killed myself for’
k

2. clouds up ghost song

‘j,
I typed one just now
And it was gone
I am typing it again
All based on my memory
k.’

3. dark messages

the time k asked for a stamp
the time k asked j what the cards she drew meant
all the time when k could not ask to see him

4. the word ‘L’

A guy came up to k at the library
he started naming names
they both might know.
k excused herself

5. the name ‘L’

When k took the extra route
Just so to see L’s car parked outside
She would wait
Till it’s the latest time

6. empty H(eart)

k and L were made for each other
so both of them try not to meet again
pretending they have never met

7. dead bodies

k just finished j’s suicidenotebook
there is a dead body on each page
it’s a funny book

8. suicide noveauground

k and j made a suicide pact
they decided to live

reader k | 10/15/2005 12:42:00 AM | 0 comments

Friday, October 14, 2005

UNTITLED

FOR A GOOD FRIEND

reader k | 10/14/2005 01:38:00 AM | 7 comments

Thursday, October 13, 2005

losing isobel - for real

losing isobel

delighted,
isobel skipped round the words
only to find him slowly fading away.

she waited.

she lost the time.

she lost herself.
and herself and herself.

still,
she skipped round the words
in anticipation of hurt.

out of sight,
out of sound.

*i am needing this as i have anticipated.

reader k | 10/13/2005 01:07:00 AM | 0 comments

let's celebrate tonight

that was just after the time
i last saw you.
you left.
and left a message:
"let's celebrate tonight".
we didn't.

what if we did?
will today be today?

reader k | 10/13/2005 12:46:00 AM | 0 comments

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

isobel died.

isobel died of breakfast.
too much work. too much, too much.
why are you smiling?
i found his number, but i didn't call.
she ate? she never eats!!!
build a casket for my tears.

reader k | 10/12/2005 12:42:00 PM | 4 comments

Communication by The Cardigans

and i was listening to it...

reader k | 10/12/2005 01:43:00 AM | 1 comments

Tuesday, October 11, 2005

personal banking

dear valued customer,
i'm your personal banking.

thankyou for banking with me for this past year. it has been a great year of exciting investment and growth. i have been most privileged and happy to be providing for your needs and taking care of you all these while. as the year is coming to an end, let's review your privileges as a valued customer.

i have all your personal data, secrets, kept confidential. you can continue to confide in me your worries, sadness and happiness. i will do my best in advising you on your investment to ensure a high percentage return for you. at the same time, I will safe-keep your savings for you.

on the personal level, i will give you full attention whenever you ask for. do not worry as i will take care of your needs, whenever applicable, whenever within my means.

and of course, i listen to you. i have a 24-hours call line open just for you.

truly,
i care
and
i exist

reader k | 10/11/2005 09:40:00 AM | 7 comments

Sunday, October 09, 2005

the end of the purple room

the only classroom in the whole school with purple walls.
the little corner where the dried paint brush still reside.
the window where all your books are collecting dust from.
the board behind that was never been updated properly.
the chemistry and maths formulaes you guys painted on the wall.
the mirror inside the back cupboard / changing room.
the wall clock that is still running.
the cinema seating arrangement.
the laughter.
the sadness.
the scolding.
the door i so passionately slammed.

i am going to miss all these,
and more,
so so so so so much.
i am going to miss sec 5NB.

reader k | 10/09/2005 11:21:00 PM | 0 comments

not to be | lost

the one not to be
decided.

not to look
into
your eyes.

not going anywhere.

it is not to be.
what do you want from me?

..............................................................

the one i lost
i wanted to give him a call,
to wish him happy birthday.
i didn't.
then it became belated happy birthday.
i didn't.

i realised.
his number was gone
when i lost my phone.
this is it.
lost.
forever.
finally.

reader k | 10/09/2005 02:26:00 AM | 3 comments

Saturday, October 08, 2005

seriously thinking

overwhelming.
going so well.
perhaps this is the best time
to leave.
so that
i will not watch you leave
me.
i am finding reasons to hate you.
not easy.

a foreign film:
the wife killed herself
a few days after the wedding
because
that was the best times
of her life,
that far.
she wants to keep that happiness.
so she left.

just a thought.

reader k | 10/08/2005 02:02:00 AM | 4 comments

Thursday, October 06, 2005

dreamy

love the wheels.

you are in control.
you find your own way.
you are there.
you make the decision.
you are the explorer.
you make things happen.

your sanctuary.
your laughter echoed.
your sadness contained.
your music heard.
your secret kept.
your idea discussed.
your presence treasured.

fill up the tank.
rewind.

reader k | 10/06/2005 12:23:00 AM | 7 comments

Wednesday, October 05, 2005

carpe diem, my love

for my beloved sec 5,

i shall put this plainly, in simple words.
there are 30-odd days more to your O levels.
some of you are really feeling the urgency,
some of you are, well, hanging in the mid-air.

every morning i am afraid to walk in.
no longer a reading period, but self-study time.
i don't see much initiative from most of you.
i am sad to notice that.
perhaps you are tired from the previous day's
mock exam,
but that is not a good reason to slack.

i won't do it again,
coming in to nag and scold,
to count the number of days left for you.
you should know by now how much i care,
how much i worry for all of you.

as i start to pen down your testimonials,
i look forward to the day of your graduation,
i look forward to seeing you getting the O levels cert.

within these 30-odd days,
within the few hours of papers you need to sit for,
your fate will be decided.

carpe diem, my love.

reader k | 10/05/2005 12:16:00 AM | 0 comments

Tuesday, October 04, 2005

the end of fun?

went to the doctor.
saw the workers taking down the fair.
the fun is
done,
gone.

the ferris wheel
is gone.
the roller coaster
is gone.
the silly horse ride
is gone.

the field is left bare.
again.

back to serious work.
once my headache is gone.

i went into Dr Tey's office.

reader k | 10/04/2005 11:00:00 PM | 0 comments

Sunday, October 02, 2005

things

let's love things.

be here:
http://www.luxist.com/

ABOUT LUXIST
Luxist is a blog
— an online magazine —
obsessively covering luxury products.
We aren’t paid
to mention specific products
and we don’t get to keep
any of the items you see here.
All advertising
will be clearly labeled
as advertising.

reader k | 10/02/2005 06:43:00 PM | 1 comments

where do we go next?

coffee bean.
pina colada
and tonight my name is caren.
- gathering of the fellow crap
.........................................................

coffee shop.
teh O
kopi O
kopi
HK noodles.
ghost stories.
haunted movies.
ikhwan buying kopi.
.......................................................

on the road.
mc cafe.
a poem from you
through sms
while you were shitting
in a public toilet.

rounders.
catching.
*choup
*twist
"i'm glad we have a childhood"
C said.

tea (passionate)
chocolate (hot)
double-chocolate (lame or just whip cream?)

lizard peering through VS fish flapping.
i fear the latter.
i'm sorry i didn't shake your hand.
.......................................................

pasir panjang road.
curvey lanes
mocking initial D.

passed NUH.
passed MOE.
passed holland V.
into dempsey road.
total darkness.
detour to see my old apartment.
my window was lit,
just liked before.
i hate them putting up the grills.
.......................................................

farrer road.
adam road.
mc ritchie reservoir.
police officer.
*bleh
.......................................................

U-turn.
PIE towards jurong.
eng neo.
turf city.
closed.
no stars.
passed corduroy & finch
no i didn't have the medditerranean plate
i had the crab soup.
next time there.
.......................................................

jurong kechil road.
bus-stop.
clueless.
tired.
toilet break.
.......................................................

bt batok central.
carpark.
totally tired.

home.
.......................................................

driving through all west.
full tank petrol
empty mind.
cheerful hearts.

reader k | 10/02/2005 11:01:00 AM | 0 comments

Saturday, October 01, 2005

it's your day

to all children
who read my blog,

Have a fun-filled
Children's Day!!!

reader k | 10/01/2005 02:30:00 PM | 0 comments

because she loves too many people

J once wrote:
i'm afraid of mrs m
because she loves too many people

an old friend, Derrick once asked me,
"are you always this nice to people?"
after we verified that we don't
share the same feelings
for each other.

i said yes, why not?
he said don't.
because people misunderstood.

i don't understand why.
why can't i be nice to people.

art school.
a classmate mistaken my niceness
for love-interest.
he said i was too nice to him,
gave him the wrong idea.

dear J,
i'm afraid you are right.
i am link into a picture
of a lovers' discourse.
because i am nice.
and i love too many people.
so,
someone hates me.

now i need Roland Barthes
to explain to her,
"it is all a question of using signs;
and of signs which have no actual content".

reader k | 10/01/2005 01:18:00 AM | 4 comments